With the turn of the new year, one can't help but wonder what things will happen over the next 12 months. Last week, I had a very realistic dream that Marcus all of a sudden started walking. Like REALLY walking. It felt so real that as I was waking up, I was planning on calling his PT to tell him the good news. But it wasn't true...not yet, at least. I wonder if this will be the year. How I hope it will be!
I long for the day that Marcus and I can have a heart-to-heart and I'll hear him say, "Mom, I know you and Dad have cried a lot over me. And I know there are major challenges in my life that are really hard for me to go through. But my Father is the Creator and Sustainer of the universe and my Good Shepherd laid down His life for me. So you don't have to worry about me, Ma. I'm set for life."
Oh, how I long for that day!
But as much as I want to see all the wonderful things that could come about in the future, I've been feeling more and more that I want time to slow down. There's really no hurry for the next great thing. The kids and I took a little outing last week and as I shot pictures of them on my camera, I took mental pictures of them as well to file away in my heart.
I deliberately wanted to remember them as they were that day, enjoying them before she stopped calling her training wheels "stabilizers".
Or before swinging all by herself wasn't something to show off anymore.
Or before he outgrew the kiddie swing.
Or before being silly wasn't her default state.
I wanted to remember that they LOVED being together and that any little thing she did made him laugh.
But on the ride back home,
Marcus decided that he'd pedal himself a bit for the first time. Another small milestone, which means that time is indeed moving along.
Someone was proud of himself and I told him he was a big boy.
But he corrected me. "Very, very big," he said.
I guess it's inevitable. They're growing up.
Boy, are they growing up.