It's ironic that I'm about to post pictures of my kids and record what we've been up to lately because tonight, I was a bad bad mommy. Like, this mommy needs a major spanking kind of bad mommy.
It all started with the beloved CA Grandma coming over. Something about her raises the energy level in all 3 of the kids about five notches. Add to that the fact that she brought balloons. Not the helium kind, but the regular kind where the kids throw them in the air and at each other, with each throw accompanied by high-pitched screams. Not squeals, screams. Happy screams that sound like they're being killed.
Dinner time was approaching and I had nothing prepared. Audrey's animal project due tomorrow went missing and I ended up foraging through every pile and drawer and even dug through the trash bins outside to no avail. Yes, my hands touched dirty diapers covered in half-eaten food slime. The boys were each excitedly impatient about everything they wanted to do, which changed every few minutes. I tried to make Derek watch a DVD but he hated every one I put in, screaming at me to pick the one he wanted, which did not exist. Marcus was banging so loud on the drums that my MIL and I couldn't understand what each of us was saying. Audrey had to scream her praying mantis oral presentation at my face so I could coach her on it. Then, Marcus broke his drum stool on purpose but then yelled out for a repair before a meltdown ensued. Then, he screamed out for a piano lesson. Then, the rice I was cooking on the stove overflowed while Marcus was trying to play Pop Goes the Weasel on the piano. Then, Derek was at the beginning stages of a hunger tantrum, where it sounded like he was about to hyperventilate but not really. Then, Derek threw a fit when CA Grandma opened the door to leave and I wouldn't let him play outside. Then, Marcus peed in his pants.
I felt like my world was Out - Of - Control. So I let loose on the kids and screamed meanly and loudly at my children. It was a wicked stepmother plus demon possession combo. Yep, not pretty.
I plopped one naked man-baby and one naked pee-drenched rascal in the bath and as I was about to bend over to wash them, Marcus looked up at me with wet eyes and softly asked with a quivering voice, "Forgive me...Mommy."
Marcus' words pierced my mean heart and the Holy Spirit opened floodgates of tears. Once I started crying and asking for forgiveness, he began weeping uncontrollably. What proceeded could have been filmed as a Korean drama. We embraced, crying and moaning on each others' necks as if we ate our last ration of rice in a poverty-stricken land and I had to bid him farewell because he would have to be raised by our poor neighbors while I went into the city to find work. Derek, quiet for once, just stared at us so I grabbed him too and then called Audrey into the bathroom. I asked her to forgive me for being an angry mommy and she, with tears welling up in her eyes, stroked my shoulder and back as if to absolve me of my sin.
We are drama.
They say that a parent's love for her children is a living example of the Gospel of Grace...God's love that loves undeservingly because of Christ. What I'm realizing is that it's the other way around. My kids are so quick to forgive and lavish me with love. They never give me the cold shoulder or try to punish me for my wrongdoing. The minute I confess to them, they throw their arms around me, full of forgiveness, longing to be reconciled again. They are a picture of God's grace to me.
So in the spirit of a bad mommy undeserving of God's love and undeserving of my children, here's what we've been up to lately:
Enjoying another season of soccer.
The tame Ladybugs of last fall have turned into the fierce Blue Lightning of the spring.
Have we won a game this season? Uh, no. But the losses haven't been as bad as before. I say that's progress.
It's probably due to the fact that Marcus cheers so loudly, he chokes on his saliva.
And our mascot is pretty into it too.
Being stoked that Mommy took off his leash at the park.
Exploring a new area of geeky interest.
He makes me ask him what the planets are so that he can list them out. A galaxy mobile and a telescope are on his wishlist, along with a real brass saxophone and a high hat for his drum set. There's no doubt that he'll have greasy hair and will hang out in the band room with his geeky friends in high school, speaking astronomy to each other. I love geeks, by the way.
Snacking outside after school.
Sound effects to these pictures: mouth breathing, snot vibrations, wet slurps, masticating of juicy pieces that are too big for their mouths, loud swallows. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Wishing he could too.
DIY-ing a ghetto spout cover.
Investing in some backyard entertainment.
Not too sure about it.
Hanging with Aunties and cousins.
After looking at these pictures, I'm prescribing myself a daily chill pill, continuous prayer, and meditation on the Word of God. This bad mommy's gonna go to bed and ready myself for another day with the munchkins tomorrow. Thank goodness His mercies are new every morning!